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Day: July 11, 2010

Nothin goin on but the rent

Nothin goin on but the rent

I don’t remember what that song was, just that one line. Actually it’s, ain’t nothing going on but the rent. Yup. July is going to be our tightest month. Oh, I hate tight. Tight makes stress levels higher than they would be otherwise. Money truly is the root of all evil, or at least the middle management of crankiness and arguments.

I am still waiting for my insurance to say yeah or nay to approving payment on IVIG treatment. Right now I’m treatmentless. Ha. Still on the prednisone, ugh. Still prednisone fat. It’s not even the belly that bothers me the most, although I do look slightly (ahem) preggers, but the under the chin thwaddle. Is that what it’s called? I’ve got buffalo hump, preg belly, and my chest size is astronimical (never thought I’d see that in this lifetime without surgery) but the one thing that I really can not stand

Even dense facial hair does not hide the 'thwaddle'

EVEN DENSE FACIAL HAIR CANNOT HIDE THE THWADDLE

is that dang fat that hangs out under my chin, extra neck. uck. I got off track there…

I had to stop taking my plaquenil, (hydroxychloroquine) because my eyes are really going. I kept telling my old rheumy that my vision was quickly failing me and he told me it was my age. He said I didn’t need eye exams, oh man. No matter how much you like your doc, always go with your gut! I didn’t. I just nodded my head and now my eyes are really bad. I am referred to an eye institute upstate, but they couldn’t get me in until next month. A few weeks ago I started seeing what I had heard people describe as an aura. The Nugget was playing in the kitchen and I was sitting there watching her and all of the sudden she had this glow around her shoulders. My daughter was talking to me and I guess I got a really scared look on my face because she stopped talking and said “mom! what’s wrong?” I couldn’t stop staring at her because I was looking at it right on and it was still there. You know how sometimes you see things out of the corner of your eye but if you turn your head it disappears? Well it didn’t go away and I just kept staring.  For a minute I thought I was seeing her aura until I started looking around and everything was like that. I had a moment where everything seemed surreal and it brought one one doozy of a panic attack.  It got worse until it was happening more often than not and I started fearing for my sight. I’d heard of plaquenil toxicity in the eyeballs but not any of the particulars. I stopped taking them when everyone looked double vision. I just wish the appointment wasn’t so far away.

Well, I started writing this post 2 days ago.  I keep falling asleep and taking up where I left off.  I think I say this often, but this is the sickest I’ve ever been.

I’ll be back when I can think of something positive and funny.  Positive!

Until next time

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