It’s after midnight and I really have to get to sleep but I wanted to stop in and write. I always have something to say it seems, even if it’s about nothing. I still have. somethin. 🙂
So today I gave myself to do absolutely nothing until the afternoon rolled around. And I did nothing fabulously if I do say so myself! Then at 2:00 I whipped out the new steam mop and rocked these floors out. Literally. I had the rock music blaring, alternative, and I mopped 2 levels of the house and just swept down the third one. I felt pretty good abou myself. Normally I’d feel pretty bad about everyone else here though. See, when I clean I yell. lol I’d like to be able to say “I can’t help it!” but that would be a lie. We all have control over our emotions, at least to some extent. I get pissy when I clean because I start thinking “Why the hell am I doing all this? Why doesn’t anyone else do it??? Why don’t they care to live in a ‘beginner-level’ hoarders home??? And then the screams come out of me whether I want them to or not.
“Look out! Mom’s cleaning”. They say or “stay away from your mother. she’s cleaning.” There’s no detailed explanation needed. They know that if they come into the same room with me I’m going to start exasperatingly screaming. ‘Why can’t you put a dish in the dishwasher??? Who has a bunch of cigarette butts out front?? Why can’t anyone sweep a damn floor around here?’ and so on. I really don’t like doing this, it makes me feel like a bad person. Drumroll please….second time in a month that I haven’t yelled at anyone. Or even just yelled out to the universe, I don’t need anyone home to yell. I have been known to yell whether the family is around to hear me or not. hahaha I told Big C ‘I think I’m finally growing up! It only took 45 years.
Until next time,