Browsed by
Tag: insomnia

Insomnia…again

Insomnia…again

OK, I’m getting pretty darn sick of not s l e e p i n g.  It makes me weird, or weirder and it makes me cranky. And I tend to do little menial things that no one in their right mind would do if they had the time.  Like getting the dirt out of the bottom cracks in the designs on kitchen cabinets with q-tips?  No one ever does that.  So if you can’t sleep, and you’ve sworn off of picking up the computer (thereby probably blowing your chances of any sleep at all) put the q-tips down and back away.  Back away from the q-tips.  I wonder how many hits this is going to get from people with ear issues who are Googling q-tips.  Then they get this, and their like, I can’t stand to read her, it’s a good thing my ears are messed up, could you imagine having to have to listen to her?? ahhhhh hahhh.  I’m going to put on some coffee.  Then I don’t know what.  Maybe I’ll take some pics of the snow!  It snowed here last night and just a bit stuck.

Until next time (after a nap)

Sleep is overrated, not.

Sleep is overrated, not.

Another night of no sleep. Sleep is my enemy, I wanna be your friend Mr. Sleep!! It seems like lately I’m nodding off to sleep during the day or I’m not sleeping at all for a couple of days. Dr. is useless when it comes to this issue. My Ambien just quit working. Either my body has become completely tolerant to it or, well, that’s the only thing I can think of. He prescribed me Lunesta, the med with the vewy pwetty butterfly fluttering softly over the lady’s face as she drifts off to sleep….ahhhh. Nope. Lunesta gave me no resta. Not only that, but when I swallowed it I got THE most foul taste in my mouth. Ever. It was there a day and a half later and 25 tooth brushings later. Nothing could get rid of that mungmouth. It was unbelievable. I actually dug the paperwork out of the trash and read the possible side effects and close to the top was ‘bad taste in mouth’. Understatement of the year. I don’t know if I could take it even if it promised me 8 glorious hours. Well, I got absolutely nothing accomplished this sleepless night either. Something is wrong with this computer. Almost each time I type or click anything, my cursor freezes up and the wheel just a keeps on spinnin. My brother swore up and down that Macs just don’t get viruses like PC’s do so I went through anything and everything that I recently installed and uninstalled it. Nada. I don’t want to have to put it in the shop, I can’t live without my trusty laptop. I mean, untrusty laptop. OK, that’s it for me. I’m just rambling to ramble. I can’t wait for the Big C and the bean to get up so I have some company. I’m allmooost tempted to make noise…but that would be just plain mean on a Sunday morning. Wouldn’t it otc viagra?

Image: FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Coma sleep, with a side of hot burning legs please

Coma sleep, with a side of hot burning legs please

I don’t want to order that but it’s been on my plate now for a few months.  I’m starting to get really discouraged and depressed.  My Rheumatologist wanted to see me the next time my hands blew up.  (they actually blow up, it’s gross) So anyway, I’m flaring really hard and always as a precursor to a flare, my knuckles get really red, like shiny red, my eyelids become really swollen on top and hang over my lids (gosh I feel sexy just typing this…) and then my hands start to split open all over the place.  Sometimes they swell in my sleep, sometimes not, but either way they are monstrous.  Soooo, 2 weeks ago my hands start up again.  But I forget I’m supposed to go in.  Towards the end of the monster hand I remember and call him up.  I get to see him the next day and they are pretty much healed.

He says he can still see the damage and it looks like the dermatomyositis.  Okayy.  He ran the whole shebang of labs; ANA, sed, C-reactive, Comprehensive Chemistry, RA factor, and anything else he could scribbble in.  So I call this morning to find out the results and the nurse comes on the line and tells me that Dr. wants to speak with me personally and set up a plan of action.  So I wait. And wait.  I’m thinking all of the worst things imaginable since I am such an optimist at this point in my life….why in the hell couldn’t she just tell me the numbers, she always does… finally I call and tell the receptionist I am in the throes of anxiety waiting for the call.  She informs me in an official tone that ‘Doctor is still seeing patients and cannot come to the phone. He will ring me after 5.’  Well, luckily I went back into my coma sleep so I didn’t have to smack everyone’s hands off the phone.  I so smartly decided months ago to cancel call waiting because it bugged the crap out of me whenever I was on the phone hearing that beep beep beep, only for it to be a telemarketer, or bill collector.  Right at 5 he calls and tells me that other than my ANA being positive, all of my numbers look pretty good just like last time.  He says we’re damned if we do, and damned if we don’t.  I don’t ask him what we’re damning about because I’m pissed that I worried all day for this.  He told me the plaquenil could very well be keeping my numbers at bay. Well, it’s not keeping my symptoms at bay.  I’m sick and tired of being sick and tired.

When I first came to him before I got on any meds, my numbers were through the roof and I couldn’t walk without assistance.  My PCP told me I had Lupus (prematurely based on one lab test) and my Rheumy was hesitant to say for sure what we were looking at; RA with some dermatomyositis and palindromic rheumatism thrown in for good measure.   That’s what the labs and symptoms told him.  Now he says the plaquenil is working, I’m walking much better, my numbers are low but I’m flaring more often than not.  I’m frustrated that I get a diagnosis, then have it taken away.  Again and again.  Right now I’m back to Undifferentiated Autoimmune Vascular Disease or Undifferentiated Autoimmune Disease, Connective Tissue Disease… Then it will be MCTD, then back to the early RA with dermatomyositis and so on.  Never in my life have I WANTED a diagnosis, til now, I just want to make sure I’m on the right meds for the right disease.  I don’t want any joint damage.  We tried methotrexate but it made my legs freeze and burn right down to the bone so he discontinued that but didn’t try anything else.  One thing he says he is sure of is it’s not Lupus like everyone thought in the beginning.

Is this a rambly confusing post from a frustrated woman?  Yes.  I haven’t posted much of anything lately because I have just been too sick to even want to sit down and type.  But last night I couldn’t sleep a wink after 1:30 so here I am!  I’m going to post a pic of my hands when they were on the mend.  You can see the rashy red spots, but there were no splits in this shot. I also got turned on to a video on myositis, it touches on the basics, but it’s interesting and it’s good to see someone talking about it.  And last but not least, I  posted some more photos in the Happy Snaps.  Those are cool and stress free, LOL.  Every shot I’ve gotten so far has been right in our yard.  I’m lucky to have such beautiful flowers pop up.

Today will be a better day!!

Until next time

%d bloggers like this: